


A Long Awaited Return

by Aquila_Star



Series: Powers of Persuasion [25]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst, F/M, M/M, More Feels, family love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-16
Updated: 2016-05-16
Packaged: 2018-06-08 18:12:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6868003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aquila_Star/pseuds/Aquila_Star
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Coming home to the mountain is strange and wonderful all at once. With so many things new, is anything the same?</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Long Awaited Return

Dis gazed up at the newly rebuilt gates of Erebor, sorrow and joy at war within her. It was plain to see, for one who had grown up within those gates, that much damage had been done. They were secure, yes, but to her well trained eye, the signs of hasty repair were obvious. 

She sighed, knowing that the inside of the mountain was undoubtedly in much worse shape, but then, it had been just over six months since Thorin and his Company had ousted the dragon and with but thirteen Dwarves and what help Dain could provide, there was no doubt that improvements were slow in coming. 

And yet, when she spotted the guards on the battlements and the frantic activity on the ground, she was filled with immense pride and no small amount of joy. 

He had done it. Thorin had retaken Erebor. 

She imagined her brother, the majestic bearing he had always carried, even during the depths of poverty and despair, her heart swelling to think of him wearing the crown of their grandfather in his proper place on the throne. 

It was a fanciful vision at best. true, Thorin may be King, had been raised and trained to be so, and he had ruled their well people in exile, labouring tirelessly for the benefit of his subjects until he had established his own halls and secured their safety and security in the ancient city of Belegost. However, Thorin had never desired power for the sake of power, he had only ever sought to do his duty and care for his people. He had been, and would continue to be, a true King of the Line of Durin. 

Dis heard a cry go up as she approached the gates, the mountain rising tall and majestic above her as the caravan neared, no doubt well expected. When Thorin and the Company had departed, she had begun the preparations for the great Eastern Migration, as she had come to call it. They would not leave until word came that the mountain was won, but they would be ready the day word came. And they had been. Less than a week had passed after the raven bearing the news had arrived, and the Dwarves of Belegost, formerly and soon to be of Erebor once more, had set out on their return journey. They had set out for home.

They had finally arrived. 

The shouts that had come from the gates were, as Dis had suspected, her sons. She was overjoyed to see them, alive and whole, though she had received a letter from Balin outlining the injuries they had received in battle. Fortunately, and here she whispered a prayer of thanks to Mahal, they had not been fatal, and all three of her boys, for her brother may be the elder but he was still her boy, had survived. So had the whole of the Company, according to Balin, for which she was also grateful 

Mahal had blessed them indeed. 

“Mum!” the boys yelled in unison, and Dis dismounted in one smooth motion and was caught up in the arms of her sons, at last. The three shared a tight hug, though she noticed that Fili had flinched and stiffened slightly, his wounds not completely healed, it seemed. 

“My beautiful boys,” she said fondly, her voice barely more than a whisper, tears unbidden in her eyes and she stood back and took them in. They had both grown, perhaps not in stature, but in bearing. They had seen much sorrow and many troubles, but had come out on the other side battle tested warriors. Their faces were bright with joy, and their hair was uncharacteristically neat, tidy braids adorning thei...

Wait. 

Her train of thought stopped when she spied a very unexpected braid woven into Kili's dark hair, the brightness of a copper bead all but glowing on its dark background.

Her eyes widened. The bead was unusual, she could not decipher the symbols imprinted on it at a glance. She turned to look at her eldest, his expression suddenly bashful, his cheeks flushed red, and a similar braid in his hair, fastened with a...wooden bead?

Her sons, both of them barely of age, were courting.

Who, she could not say. Fili's bead was as unusual as Kili's. Wood was never used as a courting or family bead, unless in the direst of need. It was marked with flowers and ribbons of vine, while Kili's looked like a field of stars over a flowing script she couldn't recognize from so far away. She gave them both an appraising look. 

“Explain,” she demanded, standing back out of their arms. 

The boys, though she realised she could hardly keep calling them that now, if they were battle tested and preparing for marriage, shared a look, but just as Kili opened his mouth to reply, he was interrupted by a loud voice calling for her. 

“Sister!” Thorin bellowed, striding toward her, looking every part the victorious king, even without a crown on his brow. He wrapped her in a bruising hug, which she returned quite eagerly. 

“My brother,” she replied when she pulled back, studying him as she had her sons. 'No courting braid,' she noted, and yet, there was something...off, about Thorin. His face bore a smile of delight, but his eyes were dark and haunted. He looked gaunt and strained with more than the difficulties of the quest and consequent rebuild. 

“What's wrong?” she asked in the same commanding voice she'd used with her sons. She had noticed the significant look Fili and Kili shared behind Thorin's back, neither of them meeting her eyes. 

“Nothing, as you see,” Thorin replied, his hand sweeping a broad gesture, indicating the work at the gates, the bustling activity as the caravan moved past them into the mountain. “We have made excellent progress this past winter.”

“Thorin,” she said, her voice a warning. She was not fooled one bit, and he knew it. His smile slid off, and his face took on a despair that broke her heart. “Thorin, what's happened?”

His head dropped, and Dis imagined she could see the weight pressing into him, dragging him down. He looked more burdened now than he had at their lowest in the Blue Mountains. 

“I...Dis,” he began, meeting her eyes. She gasped, the pain in them was profound and crushing. “I lost...I lost my burglar.”

“Your...but I don't understand,” she said, confused. She glanced towards the boys once more, but they were both looking at their boots. “I thought everyone survived. Balin told me the burglar had returned home, safe.”

As quickly as he had let it fall, the veil rose up over his face once more, shuttering away his pain.

“I can't...I won't talk about it,” he said, his voice suddenly hard and devoid of emotion. “I have things to do. Fili and Kili will show you to your rooms.”

With that he turned and strode away, his shoulders tense and his spine straight, for all that he appeared to be carrying the weight of the world. Dis stood and watched as he left, sorrow trailing him like a cloak. She turned, taking in her boys, their faces also wreathed in sorrow, then saw Balin approaching. From him, she would get her answers.

“Balin,” she said, taking in his nod of greeting and returning it. “Tell me what has happened to my brother.”

“It's rather a long story, lass,” Balin said, giving her a sad, exhausted look. “Although I could sum it up with two words.”

“Bilbo Baggins,” Fili said. Kili nodded, his face as sad as his brother and Balin's. 

“Bilbo Baggins?” Dis asked, her brow furrowed in confusion. “That's the Hobbit's name? The burglar?”

“Yes,” Balin confirmed, glancing around and putting a hand on her arm to pull her away. “But it would be best to have this discussion in a more private setting.”

Dis saw the wisdom in that, so she put her curiosity aside for the moment and followed as Balin and the boys led the way into the mountain. 

She was distracted by the sight of the inside. Here, the desolation of Smaug was much more evident. While the majority of the rubble had been removed and repairs were well underway, the damage to the floor and the pillars was unmistakeable. 

Smaug didn't do anything by halves.

“It's still rather unfinished here,” Balin explained as they walked through the entrance hall and deeper into the mountain. “We've been focused on the gates, the kitchens and the living quarters. Also, we've decided that the sooner we get the gold counted and stored away, out of sight, the better. Gloin has a team working on that around the clock and they are almost finished. We've also spent a great deal of the winter fixing such infrastructure as is necessary, plumbing and sewers for example. Also, efforts have been satisfactory in refurbishing the great forges, four of the five are now complete, and the last is almost ready. We've reopened the mines, to a limited degree, and the treasure halls, where the worst damage was, are being repaired as well. Thorin intends to build an extensive public market and common area in the main hall, a much better use than the display of excessive riches.”

“Much progress has been made,” Dis exclaimed, much pleased. 

“Oh, aye, but we still have a good ways to go. Having the Men of Dale in the mountain over the winter was a great help, as it allowed our most skilled labourers to focus solely on their tasks.”

“They have moved back to Dale now?”

“Only just. Once the weather broke we shifted the majority of our efforts to Dale, so the Men could get on with the business of planting. A good portion of the city is habitable now, and all of the Men have returned to it. Well, most of them. Some stayed because they were well suited to working the mountain.”

“You'll have more help now,” Dis pointed out, and Balin nodded.

“A great boon to our progress, indeed. Both in Dale and Erebor.”

“And how did the Men handle being in the mountain with all the gold? No doubt the dragon has left its mark on it,” Dis said, wondering just what kind of a winter could be had in such a situation, although Balin did not allude to any such difficulties. 

“It hasn't been an issue, as Gandalf released the gold from the dragon's curse.” Balin said with satisfaction. 

“Was it an issue before?” Dis asked. Then she saw the look shared between the three, and wondered how wrong she could be. 

“It...was, yes,” Balin admitted. “Thorin was not unaffected when we first returned to the mountain, though he is well recovered now, and will not be sliding back, I'm certain of that.”

“But that's wrapped up in the story of the burglar,” Kili added.

“Yes, we will have to get to that in due time,” Balin added. “Ahh, here we are,” he said, and Dis saw that indeed, the royal wing was in excellent condition. Their apartments were well protected in the lee of the mountain. 

“The living quarters were all structurally sound,” Fili explained. “Although they needed a good scrub, and most of the furnishings needed repair or replacing. The Men helped with that a great deal, they are fine workers of wood, after all.”

Dis noticed that her son said this with a blush upon his cheeks, and could not wait for an explanation of all that had happened. 

“They seem to have done a fine job,” Dis commented, taking in the royal quarters with pleasure. There was a large, open space for use as a common room, with an expansive seating area filled with comfortable looking couches and armchairs, all set not too far from the massive fireplace. 

A large table with many chairs dominated a back corner of the room, standing along its walls were bookcases and cabinets, though most of the books were in the libraries, the main one across the mountain, and their private library, which was contained within the suite. A modest but well appointed kitchen took up the other corner, and Dis knew that the door leading off the main room, closest to the main doors, was a small toilet room. There were a pair of desks along the wall, between the powder room and a lovely carved archway. 

“This is lovely,” she said, smiling at her sons, who beamed back at her proudly. 

“We've cleaned all of Thorin's work from the tables, so it's even neat in here,” Kili offered with a proud grin. 

“Thorin should not be working at home,” Balin said, frustration clear in his voice. “But he is stubborn as a Durin, given that he is one.”

“I'm sure you remember where to find the rooms,” he continued, gesturing at the wide archways leading from each side of the room. Dis knew that those corridors led to an array of bedrooms, with six suites down the left corridor and down the right there were three larger suites and 6 smaller rooms which shared three bathrooms between them, designed specifically for growing families. There was plenty of room for all of them, and for the future, which was a very good thing, if the beads in her son's hair were an indication. 

“I do indeed,” she said, giving Balin's arm a squeeze. 

“We put you in the first room down the east corridor, across from Thorin. Kili and I have taken the nearest rooms on the west side,” Fili told her. 

“That's fine,” she replied, drawing an hand across Fili's cheek, pride and happiness welling up inside. And yet, she was uncomfortably aware that somewhere else in the mountain her brother was working himself into a state of exhaustion in order to forget the bone deep sorrow that seems to have encompassed him. 

She knew him well, had known him for the entirety of her hundred and eighty two years. He dealt with his grief, frustration and stress in the same manner, by working himself ragged. 

“All right, sit,” she commanded the other three, seating herself in a plush armchair beside the fire, Balin taking the chair opposite while Kili sat on the couch between them, Fili joining his brother on the couch after stoking the fire and adding another log.

She waited, but no one spoke, the three of them staring anywhere but at her. 

“Right then,” she said at last, looking at each of them in turn. “We will deal with your braids in due time.” She glared at her sons for a moment, before turning back to Balin.

“So. Tell me about the burglar.” Balin took a deep breath, and launched into the tale.

“It started the first night, in the Shire. As soon as Thorin entered the smial, I could tell that he was on edge about the Hobbit. He was disdainful and dismissive, but then, Bilbo didn't exactly make the best first impression that night. We discovered later on that Gandalf, the sneaky, underhanded wizard that he is, had not, in fact, received Bilbo's agreement prior to that night. The first he'd heard of our plan was when we were all packed into his dining room discussing it.”

“After we had taken over his house and eaten all his food,” Fili interjected, shamefaced. 

“We feel really bad about it, now,” Kili added.

“Yes, well, the fact is, despite what we were told, Bilbo had not been expecting us, nor had he been informed of the details, or what we required of him.”

“I'm surprised that he didn't kick you out immediately,” Dis commented.

“He tried,” Balin admitted bashfully. “I fear that Dwalin and I were rather pig headed about it, but when a Dwarf has his mind set...”

“He follows through,” Dis finished for him. “I'm well aware.”

“By the time Thorin had arrived, late as usual, we had consumed almost every scrap of food in Bilbo's formerly well stocked pantry,” Balin said.

“We thought it was for us!” Kili exclaimed defensively. “How were we to know that Hobbits eat seven meals a day? There was so much food, and Gandalf had promised us dinner!”

“Hobbits do consume an extraordinary amount of food, when given the choice,” Balin agreed, with the boys nodding along.

“Moving along,” Balin continued. “He fainted upon hearing Bofur's rather descriptive list of ways a dragon can kill you, so we revived him and had him settled with a soothing cup of tea, and that's when Gandalf attempted to convince him to join us, which was not an easy task. Made harder by the fact that Hobbits rarely travel the whole Shire, never mind leave it. At any rate, he was unsuccessful, and Bilbo retreated to his bedchamber without signing the contract. We settled in for the night, thinking that we had lost our burglar, but determined to go ahead with the Quest anyway. We planned to leave at first light.”

Balin paused and collected himself, looking a little uncomfortable, but determined to get through his explanation. 

“That's when Thorin decided to take matters into his own hands, so to speak. Considering all the things that happened afterwards, I'm convinced it was less about persuading Bilbo, and more about Thorin justifying his desperate attempt to get close to him.”

“I don't understand,” Dis said, looking from Balin to the boys and back. 

“Thorin seduced him,” Kili said plainly.

“He did what?” Dis stared at him blankly, assuming that he was joking. With Kili, one never knew. But Fili was fidgeting uncomfortably, and Balin looked grave and even more uncomfortable. 

“Thorin called it 'persuading', but Kili hit it closer to the truth, I think,” Balin confirmed. 

“He...and the Hobbit was successfully seduced, then?” Dis was still having a hard time wrapping her head around the idea. Thorin was not remarkably forward about such things, although she was aware he'd had a few lovers over the years. Still, to try such a thing with someone the first night he met them, and a Hobbit, no less. It was astounding.

“Oh yeah, Bilbo was thoroughly seduced, if the sounds he made were any indication,” Fili said with a smirk.

“Fili!” Dis exclaimed, staring at her son in shock. At least he had the grace to look abashed. 

“We all became pretty inured to it,” Balin said, shaking his head. “It might have been the first time, but it certainly wasn't the last. Bilbo is not one to hold back, his opinions, his complaints, his ire...he's remarkable straight forward. And from the sounds of it, Thorin threw himself into his persuasion with exceptional vigour.”

Kili muttered something under his breath that made Fili turn red, but before she could ask him to repeat it, Balin spoke up again, perhaps a bit louder than necessary. 

“Needless to say, we weren't surprised when Bilbo caught up to us the next morning.”

“Yeah, Thorin was pretty smug about that,” Kili said, nudging his brother, who coughed into his hand awkwardly.

“Yes, he was,” Balin continued, shooting a look at the boys. “Though Bilbo may have decided to come along on his own, we'll never know. And that was just the beginning. They carried on their...physical relationship from there. Thorin made no attempt to hide it, although Bilbo seemed to think it was just between them.”

“Hobbits may not be very observant, if he thought we'd miss it,” Kili said with a snort. Balin ignored him.

“Thorin was pretty heavily in denial about his feelings, however, and treated Bilbo rather disdainfully in the beginning. True, Bilbo didn't have the skills needed to survive in the wild, but he is smart and picked everything up pretty quickly.”

“Thorin got pretty nice after Bilbo saved his life,” Fili said.

“He did? The Hobbit saved Thorin's life?” Dis asked, wondering how many times she would be shocked or surprised during the story.

“Many times, in fact,” Balin said. “He saved all of us, repeatedly. Bilbo is a great deal more than he seems, when you first meet him.”

“He sure is!” Kili said with enthusiasm. “He's smart and sneaky and funny, and more courageous than anyone I've ever met!”

“Which is all the more astounding considering how small a person he is,” Balin added. 

“The way he dealt with the trolls, remember?” Fili said with a grin. “He was amazing.”

“Trolls?”

“Yes, there may have been an incident with some trolls,” Balin said, giving Fili the stink eye, no doubt for letting something out that Balin wanted to bring up much more tactfully, or not at all. “The fact is, Bilbo is a most extraordinary and admirable creature. He charmed us all immediately and as the journey went on, he showed his great worth time and time again.”

“He was always surprising us,” Fili said. “But still, Uncle wasn't terribly kind to him.”

“Whenever he didn't have Bilbo pressed between himself and something hard, that is,” Kili said with a snigger, earning an elbow in the ribs from his brother.

“Yes, thank you Kili,” Dis said with a grimace. “I do not need to hear any more details of my brother's sex life, if you please.”

“Well, I've heard much more of it that I ever thought I would,” Kili said with a sulk. “Don't see why you should escape so easily.”

Fili elbowed his brother, hard, and Dis shook her head at the both of them. She thought about Thorin's behaviour for a moment, letting the boys tussle on the couch while Balin lifted his eyes and prayed for patience. 

“If the Hobbit,” she began. 

“Bilbo,” Fili and Kili said together.

“Fine. If Bilbo was as amazing and courageous as you say, then why did he let Thorin treat him like that? While continuing to have sex with him?”

“I think, at first, he was overwhelmed by Thorin...both in private and public moments. And then he worked hard to prove his worth, to show Thorin that he deserved a place amongst us, but in truth, every time he did Thorin's attitude only got worse.”

“Which just confirms that he was already in love with Bilbo,” Fili said sadly. Dis' head was spinning, there was so much information to take in, and it seemed that this was only the beginning. 

“He got worse?”

“Worse,” Balin said, nodding in confirmation. “Once we reached Rivendell, Thorin and Bilbo spent much of their time behind closed doors...”

“For all the good it did,” Fili said, rolling his eyes.

“Elves and Hobbits need to learn a thing or two about soundproofing,” Kili added. “Bilbo can yell to wake the dead.” He nudged his brother, who joined him in snickering. Apparently, courting or not, quest or not, her boys were still boys. 

“Not every species builds with stone, boys,” Dis commented, before turning her attention back to Balin. 

“But the night before we were to leave, they had...a bit of a disagreement.”

“It was spectacular, from what I heard!” Kili said.

“Yeah, Bofur told us he really ripped Thorin apart, and didn't take any of the crap Thorin tried to shovel back.”

“Well, I was there, and I cannot disagree with Bofur's assessment, however crude. Bilbo was not pleased with the way Thorin had been encouraging us, all of us, to behave in a...less than mannerly way. Not that all of us gave in to such an attitude.”

“Which is your way of saying, with the exception of yourself, and probably Ori, they acted like a bunch of rude, disgusting slobs.”

“Basically, yes,” Balin said, looking pointedly at the boys, who were looking pointedly at the floor, suddenly very quiet. Dis heard Kili mutter something about a fountain under his breath, but Balin continued, ignoring Kili's mutters.

“Bilbo let him know just how he felt about that. The argument went downhill from there, though in Bilbo's defence, his words were actually true.”

“And Thorin's head was probably firmly up his rear end,” Dis said, thinking that she may need to snack her brother across the back of the head.

“So Bilbo ended it,” Balin said. “He told Thorin in no uncertain terms that he would no longer allow himself to be treated in such a way. As you can imagine, Thorin did not take it well.”

“I imagine not,” Dis said.

“From there, Thorin got worse.”

“Worse still?” Dis asked, feeling defeated. Her brother was such an idiot, sometimes she had a hard time believing that they were related.

“Oh yeah,” Fili said, and Kili nodded his agreement. “It was not a pretty sight.”

“We left Rivendell the next day, with Thorin in a horribly dark mood.”

Dis noticed Balin giving the boys a significant look. They both nodded subtly before he continued. She'd have to poke at that omission at a later time.

“We were separated in the mountains and once we made it through, we realised that Bilbo was nowhere to be found. Thorin did not hold back his opinion that Master Baggins must have fled.”

“But he hadn't!” Kili said with a grin. “He popped out from behind a tree and gave Thorin a good talking to.”

“Bilbo was very eloquent. He talked about how much he missed his home, and that he knew we didn’t have ours, that it was taken from us, and he'd do everything he could to help us take it back. Though I feel certain he was speaking to Thorin alone, at that point. Thorin was pretty subdued after that, and I believe, that is when he knew.”

“Knew what?” Dis asked, still stunned at the thought of a Hobbit getting through her brother's thick skull. 

“That he was in love with Bilbo and that he had been all along. That is the moment that Thorin knew he'd found his One.”

“Oh,” Dis said, sitting back, astonished. “And...are you certain?”

“We weren't then, but now? Absolutely.”

“His One,” Dis said, her heart clenching, remembering how she'd met hers, how she'd loved him. She looked at her handsome boys, and could see so much of him in both of them. She smiled, shaking her head in disbelief. “His One is a Hobbit.” She couldn't help but laugh a bit at the very idea. 

“Indeed,” Balin said. “And truthfully, it makes a great deal of sense. Thorin is more stubborn that most, and exceptionally hard headed...”

“A true Son of Durin,” Dis commented with a snort. 

“An equally stubborn Dwarf would never have been able to deal with him,” Balin continued. “But Bilbo is not a Dwarf. He is bendable, flexible. Soft, even. And yet, he has a spine made of the strongest iron. He will not be moved once he's set down roots, and yet he can bend as needed. The wind can blow, but Bilbo bears it all, and pops back up, unharmed. It is remarkable.”

“I'd never thought of it like that,” Dis said. “You're right. He sounds perfect for Thorin.”

“And then, he saved Thorin's life!” Kili exclaimed. “Get back to the story.”

“Well, once we'd escaped the mountain and had been reunited with Bilbo, we were attacked by a large party of wargs and Orcs, led by Azog.”

Dis sighed. “Unlike Thorin, I had never been convinced that he had perished.”

“Indeed, he had not. Thorin confronted Azog, on his own, white warg and all. But Azog had the advantage and knocked Thorin about quite handily, until he was stunned, paralysed with shock and pain. Azog sent a minion to bring him Thorin's head.”

Dis felt a chill rush over her. If she had not seen the evidence to Thorin being alive and well, she would have felt sick to her stomach. She still did, a little. “Where were the rest of you then?” she asked.

“We were...”

“Holding onto a tree that was hanging off a cliff,” Kili cut in. “The wargs had pushed us back so far that we thought our deaths would meet us falling from a cliff instead of being eaten alive.”

“So there Thorin was, on the ground in front of Azog, as we struggled to get out of the tree and reach him. All hope was lost, until, from out of nowhere, Bilbo slammed into the Orc who'd been ready to put his blade to Thorin's throat. He struggled with it on the ground and then stabbed it clean through. He then stood, standing in front of Thorin with his tiny sword slashing at Azog, as the Orcs closed in around him.”

“It was like nothing I've ever seen!” Fili said, reverently. “Bilbo barely came up to Azog's hip, but he stood between the Pale Orc and his prize.”

“He didn't even know how to hold his sword properly!” Kili added. “Bilbo was amazing.”

“Indeed,” Balin agreed, a fond smile creeping across his features. “And that allowed us the time we needed to get out of the tree. We attacked the Orcs, and may have defeated them all, but that is when the Eagles came, plucking us off the mountainside and carrying us far away, leaving us, whole and alive, atop the Carrock.”

“How did you manage that?” Dis asked, her eyes wide.

“Gandalf,” the boys said in unison.

“When Thorin regained consciousness, he called for Bilbo and admitted at last, very dramatically I might add, that he'd been wrong in his estimation of Bilbo's character, that he'd never been so wrong in his life. The words he spoke when he pleaded for Bilbo's forgiveness confirmed what I had long suspected.” Balin paused, no doubt for effect. And he thought Thorin was dramatic?

“Yes?”

“Thorin called him amralime.”

Dis gasped. Oh, she'd known that Balin thought the Hobbit was Thorin's One, but hearing it so, that Thorin admitted it so openly...it was astounding. 

“Bilbo had no concept of the import that word carries with it, of course. But we knew. And regardless, Bilbo forgave him.”

“It got a lot better between them, from there,” Fili said. 

“Bilbo continued to show his worthiness, saving us all many more times, though we can get into those details later. For now, it is enough to say that Thorin was utterly in love with him, and as devoted to him as you might expect.”

“Incredible.”

“We are at the point now, that perhaps the boys should like to take over, as their courtship braids will be explained in the next few legs of our journey.”

“But...what happened with Bilbo? Why isn't he here?” Dis insisted, not quite ready to switch to another perspective. “Was it the gold sickness?”

“Not as such,” Balin said. “It was short lived, and Bilbo himself drew Thorin out of it in the end. It was a much simpler reason, and one more difficult to overcome.”

“Even more difficult? What, then?”

“Bilbo is not in love with Thorin,” Balin said simply, his face expressing the sorrow he felt. “Hobbits do not love as we do, and he was devoted to his home. He wanted desperately to return, and although he cared deeply for Thorin, that is what he did. He left about a week after the battle, the day after Fili awoke.”

“He left that quickly?”

“Gandalf was leaving, after lifting Smaug's magic from the gold, and Bilbo intended to go with him. The speed of it surprised us all, not the least Bilbo, but in the end, he chose to leave. And now Thorin is...”

“Lost,” Dis concluded, her heart breaking for her brother. 

 

* * * 

 

Dis settled into her room that night, her mind preoccupied by all that she had learned. After Balin had finished, the boys picked up the tale, first Kili, describing Bilbo's spectacular feats, saving them all from spiders and Elves in turn, and describing with a fierce devotion the way he himself had been saved by Tauriel. 

She still could not believe that her son was in love with an Elf. Of all people! And yet, all three of them had described Tauriel's efforts to save Kili's life, again and again, and Fili had spoken of her single minded devotion most fervently. She had to admit, Kili had never been a conventional Dwarf, and he did need someone who could keep up with him. She looked forward to meeting the Elf the next day, so she could judge for herself. She could not help but wonder if Tauriel would appear so devoted to her son if he were not a Prince of Erebor. Her scepticism was alive and well. 

And then there was the human girl. By all accounts Sigrid was much quieter than Kili's love, but stern and determined, steadfast in her efforts to care for her younger siblings through the trials of grinding poverty, and now, in her place as Princess of Dale, she worked to alleviate the concerns and hardships of her father's people. Dis was unsurprised that such a kind, generous soul had captured the heart of her eldest. Fili had always been the more sensitive one, empathetic to the needs and feelings of others, and wise beyond his years, regardless of his somewhat childish behaviour. He would make an excellent ruler, being more prone to diplomacy than Kili. For all Fili's skill with his twin blades, Kili was the warrior of the two. 

Still, the question of Thorin haunted her. He had triumphed in all his tasks, had completed what he'd set out to do and so much more as well, and yet he had lost his very heart and soul when his Hobbit had left him.

She hadn't seen him again that day. 

According to Balin and the boys, he worked tirelessly, beginning early in the morning and working late into the night, both physically and mentally, to keep from thinking too hard about what he had lost. 

It was brutally unfair, really, that Thorin should gain so much only to lose the most precious thing a Dwarf could have. The love of their One was something each Dwarf yearned for, and something that they would mourn their whole life, if they lost it. 

Dis knew the feeling well. If she had not had two small boys to care for after her One had passed, she would have lost herself in her grief. Now that they were grown, she still felt the emptiness where their father had belonged, but she had learned how to live with it. 

Thorin had not. 

She was determined to catch him tomorrow, and have a good talk with him, to pull him out of his own head, even for a time. 

 

* * *

 

Finding him was easier said than done. She'd awoken to a lovely breakfast spread in the dining room, which she shared with her sons and surprisingly, Tauriel. The Elf had been in Dale and had returned to the mountain late the previous evening. 

Dis was impressed. Tauriel was rather short, for an Elf, which would only work to her advantage if she intended to live amongst Dwarves, but she was still quite tall. Kili's head barely topped her bosom, although Dis was sure Kili didn't mind that fact very much. She was polite, earnest in her speech and quite reasonable and intelligent. 

She was also completely, obviously, utterly devoted to Kili. 

When she looked at him, Dis felt her heart ache with longing, for she remembered that look, had seen it in the face of her One, had seen it in both her parents when gazing at each other. She knew it well, and to see it written on the face of an Elf as she gazed at Dis' son...it was unmistakeable. 

Kili looked at her the same way, though his face took on another layer, an undercurrent of 'I can't believe my own luck, how on Middle Earth could she possibly love me?' He was so besotted, it was almost comical. Clearly, they were a matched pair. She had given her blessing, there was no way she could possibly deny them. Their love and devotion for each other was palpable. 

And strangely enough, Kili's mithril Durin bead looked beautiful in her long, red hair. 

She had yet to meet Fili's love, but was assured that she would, and soon. Fili would go down to Dale to fetch her in the morning, having sent a raven to warn of his arrival. In the meantime, Dis set out into the mountain to find her brother. She had looked in his office, the throne room, the treasury office, the forges, the central mining complex, the temporary marketplace, the training yard, the library, the mess hall, even the kitchens, and then she tried the office again. 

Her second time looking in Thorin's office, she found Balin again, along with a much more confident looking Ori, who she greeted with affection. She had seen many of the Company during the day, pleased to see them all looking so well and in such high spirits.

“All right, what have you done with my brother?” she asked, after Ori had been sent off to fetch more parchment. “I have been back and forth all over this mountain, in every place I could think of, but he's nowhere to be found.”

“Ahh, he does have a habit of disappearing, when the mood strikes,” Balin said with a nod of understanding. “Whenever I try to find him and can't, I head for the battlements.”

“The battlements? What duty calls him there? Or does he just like to survey his kingdom on a regular basis?” Her Grandfather had liked to do that very thing, but she couldn't imagine Thorin falling prey to such hubris. 

“No, although it may look like that for some. Rather, it was the place he was standing when he took in his last sight of Bilbo. He could not bring himself to be there while we bade him goodbye, having said his goodbyes already, and it was late in that day before I found him and coaxed him down.” Balin's face was sad and his eyes held a heaviness in them, as if he regretted that this was a burden he could not carry for his King. “I have often found him there, these past months, staring off towards Dale, as if by stubborn will alone, he could bring Bilbo back.”

“Ahh,” Dis said, smiling sadly at her friend. “A good place for a talk then.”

“As good as any other. He will be in a more introspective mood, and you may get more than two words out of him.”

“Thank you, Balin,” she said, and left the office. 

 

* * *

 

The battlements were completely repaired, looking much as they had during her Grandfather's rule, and sure enough, her brother was there, standing alone, still as the statues that were carved to either side. 

“Thorin?” she said quietly as she approached, aching to see the hopeless, wondering look on his face. 

“I like to stand up here sometimes,” he said, his voice thick with suppressed emotion. “And think about what he must be doing now. It is the middle of June, and the Shire will be awash in colour, the vegetation bearing fruits and vegetables enough to satisfy the hungriest Hobbits. I like to think he's happy to be home, having refilled his pantry and renewed his garden, and settled back into his seven meals a day, chubby and jolly, the sleek firmness of a long trial disappearing from his face.”

“It soothes you to think of him thus?”

“Yes,” Thorin replied simply. “He so longed to be home, with his books and his armchair. His garden. I like to think that he's happy there once more, looking every bit the gentle grocer I took him for when we first met.”

“He's a great deal more than that, from what I hear,” Dis said kindly, pleased to hear Thorin speaking. She knew well that it would help to dull the pain. 

“He is so very much more,” Thorin said, smiling a sad, heartbroken smile that broke Dis' heart as well. “He's the most extraordinary person I've ever met. I tried to deny it, as I'm sure Balin has told you, but it was plain from the beginning. He captured me completely, body, mind, and spirit. I'd never imagined it could happen that fast. Or that it could be so perfect.”

“Or that it could hurt so much when it ended?” Dis asked softly, her own heart clenching with a familiar pain, in sync with Thorin's. 

“How do you bear it?” he asked, turning to her with desolate eyes. “How can I find a way to live like this? With such a horrible, aching hole in my chest? In my life?”

“I don't know, Thorin,” she admitted. “It was Fili and Kili who kept me going when their father died. You'll have to find your own path.”

“You're no help,” he said, his voice sad and affectionate at the same time.

“I'm sorry,” Dis said, moving to pull her brother close, pressing her head against his. 

“Thank you,” he replied. They turned and stood looking out over the mountain slopes, new life beginning to sprout on the fields between Erebor and Dale. The city itself looked fresher, new construction and rebuilt structures amidst the remains of destruction. It looked like a city with a fresh take on life. 

“Do you think he'll ever come back?” she asked wonderingly. Thorin sighed deeply, turning away from the view, looking back into the mountain. 

“No,” he said at last, blinking back moisture. “No, I don't. He was so eager to leave...no, that's not fair. He was eager to go home. He spoke often and fondly of the Shire, of the home he'd made for himself. I've been there, Dis. It is a lovely home, peaceful and idyllic and utterly welcoming. And who am I to begrudge someone their home? After he'd fought so hard and so long to help me regain mine.”

He looked at Dis sadly, reaching out to take her hand and giving it a squeeze. “No, I don't think he'll be coming back. I'll just have to find a way to live with it.”

“I hope you do,” she said, leaning into him affectionately. 

“I'm glad you're here, sister mine,” he said, leaning into her as well. 

“I'm glad to be here. Now, let's go eat. Chasing you around the mountain is exhausting work, and I'm starving.”

**Author's Note:**

> Yeahhh...I'm so mean. It isn't Bilbo coming home. Heehee Otoh, I've really liked writing Dis. I've loved all the interpretations of her, so of course I had to do my own. I had mostly written this part weeks ago, so I just needed to tweak it for all the plot developments. Whee.
> 
> And, almost done. I'm so glad everyone has come along for the ride with me. :)


End file.
